Dr. Tilde
Deep in a hollow redwood, a kindly doctor keeps her door open to every beast and monster in need. Come meet the patients.
T'was the Night of All Hallows
No doctor's visit tonight. Gary's spooky twist on a holiday classic, with crows, wraiths and a very suspicious neighbor. Read along, or listen with the lights down low.
Read aloud
A spooky story for the season
About three and a half minutes. The words light up as it's read.
T'was the Night of All Hallows
a poem by Gary Wood
T'was an inky, black night of All Hallows;
Creatures' stirring and whispering gallows.
Frightful pumpkins alight and a glow
A Stygian eyed, omen of death, a black crow.
Undead creatures rising from the earth below.
Witches and brooms were seen sweeping
To capture children while they're sleeping.
Creatures' sinister and stealthy, creeping;
Children shaking, scared and weeping
An ominous sooty sky deepening;
Screeching banshees portending looming dooms.
Children fitful and restless in their beds
Dreams of monsters danced in their heads.
Wreaths of garlic hug on us to protect
Littles from bloodthirsty vampires biting their neck
I woke up with a shivering start
Couldn't tell if I was awake or not
My stomach tied in a frightful knot
Paralyzed in front of my window on the spot
I looked out the window
Took a deep swallow
Witnessed an ominous shadow
Heard a freakish bellow
Coming from a terrible beast
Looking for souls to feast
It clutched a fiery pick axe
Ready for a ferocious attack.
It was sitting in a cold obsidian sleigh;
Eight wraiths held in sway,
Like shamed slaves ready to obey
When it swiveled its zombie like head staring at me
I was transfixed and started to pray
Terrified and haunted I'd become its prey,
I, desperately wanted to escape straight away
Frantically hoping it was ready to fly away
To some spectral and haunting highway.
Then an unearthly preternatural voice like roaring Thunder
Commanded eight wraiths in a chilling guttural rumble:
“Now, Gnasher, now Cancer! Now, Stomper and Slander! On, Vomit! On, Stupid! On,
Basher and Blitzgrieg away all of you miserable thralls, dash up and dash away!”
All the wraiths flew up with the Creature's sleigh in sway.
And in an instant lifted, then vanished into the pitch skyway
Then, it suddenly came to me.
My next door neighbor was fun in' me!
Had cleverly decorated his house for Halloween.
And had arranged a frightfully realistic scene.
And… I am sure all of which I witnessed
Was silly and witless…
An illusion…
Probably one of my childish delusions
I looked out the window and still had to wonder
But, I'm sure I did see a ghostly sleigh fly away up yonder;
Although, quite sure I heard an echo of a voice like thunder
I woke up the next morning bright and early
Very relaxed, not in any hurry
Suddenly recalling…was it a bad dream?
Or was our next door neighbor's evil, mean scheme
To get us kids to shake with fear, hide and scream?
Don't know for sure, but I believe it was real,
But who cares, ain't no big deal,
Because, I collected treats, candy and goodies…so awesome!
And destroyed a tub of pumpkin spice ice cream made by my mom.
Happy All Hallows Eve and a good fright to all y'all.
🎃 New for Halloween: watch The Little Guy
A short film about the smallest pumpkin in the patch.
Watch the filmFrom the Chapbook by Gary Wood · © 2026 Gary Wood, All Rights Reserved
The films
Every story is a new monster through Dr. Tilde's door, told in rhyme from start to finish.
Dr. Tilde & the Cyclops
A weepy one-eyed Cyclops shuffles in, terrified he's losing his sight. What follows is a gentle, funny little tale about being brave at the doctor — told in rhyme, start to finish.
Look Before You Look
Medusa the Gorgon has lost her snakes and wants them back — trendier and deadlier than ever. Dr. Tilde obliges. Vanity, however, has a way of catching up with a person.
Werewolf Makeover
Wally is a fierce werewolf with one small problem: he's bald, and the pack won't let him forget it. One toupee, one chin strap and a full makeover later, he is the classiest beast in the food chain — perhaps a little too pleased about it.
Teddy T-Rex's Denture Adventure
Teddy T-Rex has a toothache the size of a tree, and arms far too tiny to brush. Sixty pulled teeth, one very grumpy recovery and a set of shiny titanium dentures later, he has a brand-new motto: don't cross the Boss.
Grimes, the Tardy Grim Reaper
Grimes is a lazy Grim Reaper who oversleeps — again. Racing to work in his snazziest cloak, full of excuses, he faces the icy Big Boss Thanatos. A spooky, funny tale about owning up, and what happens when you don't.
The Little Guy
It's Halloween, and the smallest, palest pumpkin in the patch is sure nobody will ever pick him. Uncle Jeb tells the story by the fire: of Big John, the beauty-magazine pumpkins, a moonlit empty field, and the twins who come running in just before the gate closes.
Every patient has a story
Tap “Hear my voice” to let each character introduce themselves, or peek at the expression sheets from the studio. More monsters join the waiting room with every new tale.
Dr. Tilde
Calm, warm, and unshakeable. Dr. Tilde has patched up trolls, fitted glasses on goblins, and never once flinched at a fang. She meets every monster with the same steady kindness — and a knowing little smile.
The Cyclops
A big, hairy, one-eyed softie who can pummel a victim but sobs at his own boo-boos. When his single eye starts to cloud over, he shuffles to the clinic in tears — and leaves with a shiny new monocle and his swagger restored.
Medusa
Gloriously vain and just a little wicked. When Medusa loses her snakes to a hero's sword, she wants them back trendier and deadlier than ever. Dr. Tilde obliges — though a certain fondness for mirrors may prove her undoing.
Wally the Werewolf
A viciously fierce werewolf with one big problem: he's going bald, and the pack won't stop jeering. Dr. Tilde fits him with a pompadour toupee and a trendy chin strap, and a full makeover sends him strutting out as the classiest beast in the woods.
Teddy T-Rex
A big, grumbly T-Rex with a whopper of a toothache, and arms far too tiny to brush his own teeth. Dr. Tilde breaks the bad news gently, and Teddy leaves with a hundred-pound set of gleaming titanium dentures.
Grimes
A lazy Grim Reaper and a chronic late sleeper. Late for work again, Grimes dashes right past Dr. Tilde's clinic and ignores her warnings, with an excuse for everything. His motto: cry, deny, lie, and alibi. Will he ever learn?
Who is the monster doctor?
Gary wrote a poem about her — the whole legend, from the seven hundred years to the trouble with monster health insurance. Read it yourself, or let Dr. Tilde tell you in her own voice.
Read aloud
In Dr. Tilde's own voice
About three minutes. The words light up as she reads.
Dr. Tilde
a poem by Gary Wood
Doctor Tilde was a unique, amazing and fascinating person.
She was a harborer, protectoress, and healer for certain
Of strange fantastical creatures you may have heard about.
Any beast could come to her for help without fear or doubt.
Dr. Tilde, a gentle yet determined lady with steely blue eyes,
could look at you and read your secrets and discern your lies.
Rumor has it that she was over 700 years old,
and yet, her youthful energy was a marvel to behold.
There were gorgons, cyclops, wraiths, gnomes, and one Whump,
who was banished from Whump Land for his ugly hump.
Monsters and beasts had ailments and afflictions that were dire,
like the one-eyed green dragon that couldn't belch fire.
What they needed to be normal beasts was tender loving care
In order to return to their haunts and lairs to terrify and scare.
For example, the ferocious cyclops had a cataract;
Couldn't see and defend himself from foes trying to attack.
She removed the cataract and fit his eye with a monocle-eye glass,
which pulled him out of his depressive, gloomy morass.
A weepy Werewolf suffered a receding hairline and balding spot.
His fangs stained, claw nails gnarly, and mangy fur in knots.
He was embarrassed and felt worthless. Nonetheless,
she encouraged him to wear a furry toupee-skull cap.
Happily back in action with his new bouffant with a chinstrap;
A posh, well groomed and sophisticated, natty, dapper chap.
Managing these monsters, beasts, spirits and creatures
to co-exist peacefully together was an amazing feature.
She firmly prevented them from rampaging in a dreadful melee.
What was the mystery of her power? No one could say.
Dr. Tilde applied her restorative arts to nurse monsters back to health.
Such as, a dispirited wraith who'd lost his ghostly stealth.
The Screeching Banshee with tonsillitis lamented and cried,
when she couldn't shriek when some poor soul was about to die.
Hellish Medusa needed a snake-hair transplant.
Heinous Mr. Hyde couldn't growl, howl and rant.
A hideous old witch had lost her black magic,
unable to turn princes into toads was tragic.
Frankenstein needed several face stitches.
Hydra had heads-trauma with traumatic twitches.
An unholy vampire required a fang canal.
No health issue for any fiend was too banal.
She loved her work in this eerie esoteric curative niche.
Even though skilled and dedicated, she was not rich.
Her Monster Hospital served all who came for healing.
Turning away no monster was her heartfelt feeling.
Dr. Tilde clearly did not have any wealth or affluence
because none of these beasts had health insurance.
From the Chapbook by Gary Wood · © 2026 Gary Wood, All Rights Reserved
One clinic. Endless monsters.
Dr. Tilde is an ongoing storybook series — each tale a new creature, a new ailment, and the same big-hearted doctor. Here's what's on the schedule.
Now PlayingDr. Tilde & the Cyclops
A one-eyed Cyclops fears he's going blind. A cataract, a tiny operation, and one very fancy monocle later, he skulks back into the countryside with his pride — and his eyesight — fully restored.
Now PlayingLook Before You Look
Medusa the Gorgon has lost her snakes and wants them back — trendier and deadlier than ever. Dr. Tilde obliges. Vanity, however, has a way of catching up with a person.
Now PlayingWerewolf Makeover
Wally is a fierce werewolf with one small problem: he's bald, and the pack won't let him forget it. One toupee, one chin strap and a full makeover later, he is the classiest beast in the food chain.
Now PlayingTeddy T-Rex's Denture Adventure
Teddy T-Rex has a toothache the size of a tree, and arms far too tiny to brush. Sixty pulled teeth, one very grumpy recovery and a set of shiny titanium dentures later, he has a brand-new motto: don't cross the Boss.
Now PlayingGrimes, the Tardy Grim Reaper
Grimes is a lazy Grim Reaper who oversleeps — again. Racing to work in his snazziest cloak, full of excuses, he faces the icy Big Boss Thanatos. A spooky, funny tale about owning up, and what happens when you don't.
Now PlayingThe Little Guy
It's Halloween, and the smallest, palest pumpkin in the patch is sure nobody will ever pick him. Uncle Jeb tells the story by the fire: of Big John, the beauty-magazine pumpkins, a moonlit empty field, and the twins who come running in just before the gate closes.
The Troll's Toothache
A bridge-dwelling troll with a cavity the size of a cave.
The Ghost Who Couldn't Sleep
Insomnia is no fun when you haunt the night shift.
The Dragon's Hiccups
Every hiccup sets the curtains on fire. A delicate case.
Want to know when the next monster limps through the door? Follow the series →
Color the Monster Clinic
Grab your crayons! Print these pages out, or send them to a tablet to color in. Nine scenes from the Cyclops's visit and Medusa's snake-hair transplant — with more from every new story to come.
Want the whole coloring book?
All six pages in one printable PDF — perfect for a rainy afternoon at the kitchen table.
Download all 6 pages (PDF)Get the next monster in your inbox
New stories, behind-the-scenes art, and a note from Gary whenever a fresh tale is ready. No spam — just monsters.
Dreamed up by Gary Wood
The Dr. Tilde tales come straight from Gary Wood's Chapbook — a collection of warm, rhyming stories written to be read aloud to little ones (and the young at heart).
Each one follows the same gentle idea: a monster that seems scary turns out to be soft, worried, and just in need of a little care. Dr. Tilde is always there to give it.
“Everything back the way it's supposed to be — thanks to the curative ministrations of Dr. Tilde.”